Is this love?

When you truly love someone; you want only good and happiness in their


life. Even when it’s not with you. Despite the pain of not being apart of it, you love regardless.
No gripping at straws, scheming , nothing of this nature. Just Love.



Have you ever walked up to an ants nest and sprinkle water on it?  I have , I remember how crazy and unorganized the ants became because I ruined the routine ( sorry ants of my youth).  This is the similiar response tsa agents have when screening me.
I am  not a fan of the body scanner machines at the airport. I decided  for now on I will ask for a pat down. The first time I asked it threw the tsa agent off. The agent kept asking me why, as if it’s a bad thing. I told her I was not a fan of the body scanners.  She kept trying to talk me into it like a salesperson ….”you know your cellphone is worst”; my reply “So”.  Thus I have begun a journey of airport pat downs.  I never ask for a private room ….nope in the open , just in case.

Pack Challenge

One thing I learned about travel is pack a third of what I need. When I was in Euope for over three months I packed an oversize/ normal suitcase and a carry-on.
However, I still packed too much. I used maybe a third and lost many things jumping around Europe.
Less is more, just pack essentials. For instance,  winter is harder to pack since everything is bulky, thus my luggage was huge. So on this mini trip  to Colorado, Washington and California ,I test the bag theory.
The struggle is the weather changes. In Colorado it is hot and cold very confusing weather. Washington state is damp, and cold then California is sunny with a chance of cool air.
I packed two pants dark marron red and black. So far I have worn the black countless times. Packed three sweaters, grey, yellow and a blue/cream stripe. I sweat easy so I rotate them and either wash the arms or febreeze if no time. Pack countless underwear, a few socks, pjs that can be yoga clothes  light shirts for layering,  heels, boots with a heel that go with everything, one skirt and a black dress plus essential  products and my Toshiba. All in a carry-on case and a duffel, so I have nothing to check.
So far my experiment is good, Rick Steve would be proud. Yet, I feel that I packed too much still. For an adventurous traveler light, quick and spontaneity is key for new opportunities. This is the traveler I am working at being: light case, yet the right essentials for every possible occasion. It is temping for me to spend (which I do) so by learning to pack a third of what I need would be smarter.  I have a week left and hope I can do it.


My lover is missing, for I cannot find him. Actually, I haven’t met him, yet. “Yet”is all I can say to keep hope alive. “Yet , yet, yet ” I hope this phase will finally end and my lover will be. My lover is what I want and need. Why is this concept so hard to achieve? My friends want husbands and boyfriends and I, my lover.  My lover to share a warm bath with, to travel with, to read to,  to kiss, touch, to love and share a bed every night.
My lover is missing.