I am frustrated to see everyone ( I think) in a relationship and I always the sad puppy in the rain watching and hoping. UUUUGGHH!  Maybe it is who I am around , or my standards, or my lack of knowledge about dating but everyone appears to have someone accept me. The closest to a relationship I have is with a guy across the Atlantic , who has a great admiration for  Facebook’s soft porn with little Asian girls.  *Fellas do not hit the like button because , Zuckerberg made a window where anyone can see everything you fancy on Facebook.  And why do soft porn on Facebook, don’t give it away for “likes”, “selfies” and “shares”.  I am sure there is money it it but seriously FB, go harder than that ladies.

SO I am borderline frustrated with the complex situation of being single, which is freeing. I have been able to commit all kinds of ridiculous adventures and only had to answer myself. I have no conscious about my exploits , I am out and about. Then there is a time when I am out and about and I want a hand to hold, a kiss to give. This turns my day from sunshine and rainbows to  cloudy. It can happen any moment.  Then I go on this teeter totter of single , finding a man or him finding me or how ever it works.

I don not know if it is all in my head but some friends have alienated me, since I am now a third wheel for a couple years now. I am running around like a five year old that ate a half a bag of sugar, to the point I forgot or I never learned the rules ( if any) of dating.  Everything is so digital, overly forward and absolute timid in my world of dating. I meet a guy he is not into me or I am not into him or I just find him gorgeous until he speaks or he is just looking at my boobs or I realize I have no clue what to talk about when I get too nerdy or he is still looking at my boobs, or I wondering why he doesn’t eat vegetable;, how is potato chips his only “vegetable”?  or I just stop trying.

This is how I end 2013; half crazy. Happy New Years!!